Here’s an interview I conducted with Author, Tinzley Bradford that originally posted on Thoughtful Minds United:
Today I will be trying my hand at a new task I have wanted to do for a while. As an author, I have been the subject of a few interviews, but today I get to brush off my journalistic skills and become the interviewer. It is important to branch out and try new things, and this is a skill I would like to perfect. For my first interview I have chosen someone who is making a name for herself in the self-help indie world. Tinzley Bradford and I first met as co-workers at a Fortune 500 company based in Atlanta. While she still has ties there, I moved to Florida a few years ago. We stayed in touch via social media and a last year she became an author. Tinzley writes a popular dating blog called “And You Wanna See My Feet” which is also the title of her first book. This year she released her second book “The Settle-Free Dating Method for Women”. Both books are about dating and the single woman and are available now on Amazon.
Since this is my first run out of the gate, let me explain a little about my interview style. In Part I the questions are centered on Tinzley and her book. We get to know her a little bit, and converse about personal events and ideals. In Part II, the focus shifts to the business side of writing. Tinzley answers questions that provide insight on how she handles the writing world from the publishing side and provides tips for new authors.
LWT: Welcome Tinzley and thank you for agreeing to this interview.
TB: You’re welcome, thank you Lisa for having me. I’m honored for this opportunity.
LWT: Let’s get started. What prompted you to become a relationship coach? How long have you been doing this?
TB: I became interested in being a relationship coach because of my own relationship experiences. Many times bad experiences can cause many women to become broken. I’ve mastered the art of not allowing bad behavior to break me down by taking a settle free dating approach which means I’m no non-sense. I’ve been writing and blogging for about 7 years but have only started coaching for the last two. I learned to remain happy even through all my failed relationships and not let it break me.
LWT: No non-sense is a great way to be and is needed in today’s world of dating. So tell me who is your role model?
TB: My role model is my mom, she singlehandedly raised me and my sister and she still has her sanity. That’s tough these days. I have one child but she had two to take care of. She’s my hero!
LWT: There is just something special about a mother who will sacrifice for you and give you the love you need. I’m sure she has given you some great advice about not settling. I have heard some buzz about the title of your first book. Can you tell us the story behind it “And You Wanna See My Feet? I am More Than Just Some Pretty Feet”?
TB: Well this quirky title came when one of the guys trying to pursue me asked if I had pretty feet and advised he only dates ladies with cute feet. He wasn’t even looking that hot himself. I was like wait a minute let me get this straight…. You’re sitting there looking like your nick name could be Hubba Bubba AND YOU WANNA SEE MY FEET???
LWT: That is hilarious, and he had some nerve. Is this also how you developed the “Settle- Free Method of Dating”?
TB: Over the years, as I dated I noticed more and more, the guys were beginning to do less yet expect more. They wanted the benefits of a relationship, but not the commitment that comes along with that. One day I just got tired and decided I will NO LONGER SETTLE for less than I deserve. I wanted to base my new book around no longer settling, which is a word I’ve often used in my life.
LWT: Some men may be intimidated by a no-nonsense lady and call what you do male bashing. Do you consider yourself a feminist?
TB: No I’m not male bashing because I love my men, however I believe that due to all the poor decision making, low self-esteem, domestic abuse, drug addiction and sometimes suicide by women who have many times been torn apart, it’s important for me to help weak, insecure women with low self-esteem make wiser dating choices.
LWT: Who is your ideal man?
TB: My ideal man is one who values the Lord, himself and me; a man who’s not in competition with me. He’s supportive and has his own things going that he’s trying to pursue yet motivates me to chase my dreams as well. He’s positive and loves me for me; he’s a man of his word who knows what he wants in a woman and pursues her. He’s not looking for a mom; he’s looking for a wife! He doesn’t make excuses; he makes moves and does all he can to make me happy.
LWT: That is a very clear vision of the man you want. Are you open to dating the rainbow or no? Why or Why not?
TB: I believe love is where you find it with no color!
LWT: I have the same sentiment. I like that you did not include a physical description in your request. What do you think of online dating sites? Have you ever used one?
TB: Absolutely! I think as with anything you have to be careful because there are some people looking to prey on innocent, insecure women. Yes I have used online dating sites and I believe they can serve as a new way of meeting people especially with all the social media outlets going on, there are many ways to hook up but online dating is just one of them.
LWT: You have a daughter who is single and of age, does she take your dating advice?
TB: Not the way I think she should but just like many young adults these days, they have to learn from their actions. She seems to have adopted the no nonsense part pretty good!
LWT: That’s good to hear! Sometimes you have to let people make their own mistakes even if you see bad things coming. It’s the only way to really learn. What is the most important thing women should know about dating?
TB: They should know that dating is just dating which does NOT mean he is your man. Women must take the time to get to know him better and make sure he wants them just as much as they want him. A relationship should not be one sided!
LWT: OK, let’s switch gears and talk business. LOL. You have appeared on numerous television shows and done many interviews. My favorite was your appearance on The Dr. Drew Show. Tell us about your experience and how it has changed you.
TB: Sharing the panel with “Dr. Drew on Call”, Wow! It was amazing and I loved it so much! It definitely got me some exposure and I can say because of that appearance, my brand is taken far more seriously from those looking to book a contributor. It inspired me to step up as a single mom/ woman guru and increase my presence and perfect my brand as well. I’m very grateful for that experience and I look forward to joining Dr. Drew in the near future.
LWT: I love Dr. Drew and he is well respected in his field. That speaks volumes about you and your expertise. What formal training do you have? Do you think it is necessary to have a degree in order to be successful as a writer in today’s world?
TB: I strongly believe certification is a bonus and very necessary for certain expert fields, however in today’s world, experience and the right connections / audience is a huge key to being successful in your niche.
LWT: Do you have a specific writing process or ritual you follow?
TB: No not really I actually right based on emotion or based on what has influenced me at a given time.
LWT: Are you an Indie or a traditionally published author?
TB: I’m self-Published…Indie!
LWT: I’m about that Indie Life too! Tell us, how do you go about booking signings and events?
TB: I book signings through word of mouth and networking. The more events I attend the more exposure I get, hence allowing me to expand my network and hopefully someday have networks knocking down my doors to book me. Ha, Ha, Ha. That’s definitely my goal!
LWT: Well, what you are doing is working because you are on the go these days doing book signings and speaking at events. Can you please share your action plan on how to prepare for these events with the new authors that are reading?
TB: Yes I research the type of attendees that will be there as well as the host. I make sure I have a giveaway of some kind whenever I speak at an event to create excitement around my brand. I like to also give something nice to an unsuspecting person. People love free stuff! I also engage the audience and do my best to make sure my speaking points are ones that many singles can relate to.
LWT: You have such a bubbly personality that must come easy to you. It also comes in handy when you create your helpful videos for your website. Please tell us how do you come up with your topics for your videos?
TB: I read, look around, I also go by my own dating experiences and whatever I feel like sharing or discussing at the time.
LWT: What challenges have you had when marketing your book?
TB: I’m having a tough time getting my book on the shelves of certain major bookstores, because of certain restrictions/rules of those stores. As a result, I have to substitute and go hard to promote it in different ways. Being an Indie author it’s all on me to network and build relationships to help expand my brand. There is no big publishing company doing any of my social media or promoting for me, I have to do it all myself.
LWT: That is a hardship most Indie writers are facing these days. What tips can you give the new authors just starting out?
TB: First of all believe in what you’re doing because if you don’t believe in it, no one else will. Don’t be afraid to ask for help and participate in networking opportunities; this will only help you in the long run. Stay current with what’s going on and keep your audience current. Everywhere you go get those email addresses so you can build a nice size emailing list for future events. Never stop, never give up and don’t let how fast someone else seems to be evolving get you down; if anything reach out to collaborate with others. Stay positive!
LWT: That is great advice from an advice expert ladies and gentlemen. What does your “Dream Career” look like?
TB: My “Dream Career” would have me as an author, speaker, an Essence magazine columnist, and traveling around the world spreading self-love and settle free dating tips. I’d like to have my very own talk show someday, as an outlet to share my message and hear everyone else’s experiences. Oh and get paid to do it! ^Wink Wink^
LWT: Yes, getting paid to do what you love would be great! So, what’s next for Tinzley?
TB: Let me see, a lot is next for me. The sky is NOT the limit, because there is no limit. I produced a mini -movie, about settle free dating and my very first book “And You Wanna See My Feet?” that will be released online coming out; so look out for that soon. I’ll be making appearances at a few events as a speaker, so definitely expect to see me and my “Settle free Dating Method” book out and about. I’m aiming to become a regular contributor on a popular morning show so wish me luck on that. I want to be a columnist for a popular magazine centered on my niche. I’d also like to start an academy for young single moms and women to empower them to be better and live the life they were born to live, settle free.
LWT: Wow, that sound amazing and very time consuming. It should keep you busy for quite a while. What do you want to be remembered for?
TB: Empowering women to live settle free and enjoy their life whether they are single, in a relationship or married. Love life and be happy at this very moment with what they have now just like I do!
There you have it ladies and gents. I hope you found Tinzley as fascinating as I do. To find out more about The Settle Free Method of Dating or if you Wanna See her Feet, you can contact Tinzley here:
Instagram – @tinzleyb
Youtube – Tinzley Bradford
Purchase her books here: